Iskra Fileva discusses self-sabotage, writing, “Self-sabotage may have to do with what we think we deserve. Even if we do not see ourselves as deserving of punishment, we may not believe we are worthy of success and happiness either. What often passes for insecurity and self-doubt may, at bottom, be a belief that we have not and perhaps cannot earn the right to get what we want: ‘I am not the kind of person who will ever be happy, loved, successful, etc,’ is a common attitude among self-saboteurs.”
She also points out that people can, due to self-doubt, “slide into a cycle of self-sabotage little by little, imperceptibly.” She gives the example of someone trying to become a painter but who starts, little by little, spending more time screwing around and less time actually painting. But people can also pull themselves out of self-sabotage, one productive act at a time.
Incidentally, Fileva’s article squares nicely with what Ayn Rand and Nathaniel Branden have written about self-esteem.
Tags: self help